Today was really tiring. We’d travel
from Shah Alam to Putrajaya back to Bangi then finally to Serdang. And that’s all just to pay a visit to
our once-a-year-meet relatives. Syawal really is something. *phew
So, the incident happens when we’re at
a food stall . . .
Ibu : Ika, tinggal ni je *tunjuk
muka* ( pakai purdah )
Me : Nanti nantilah bu.
Ibu : Cerita malam tadi ( Ayat – ayat
Cinta ) tuh, perempuan nya pakai purdah . . .
*I just have the courage to wear
shawl recently.
I was quite shocked when she asked me
about it. It’s not like I’d never been thinking about wearing it but, there are
so many reasons that hold me from doing so. I even bought one veil myself when
I was at the Baitul Qurro’.
Why bother to buy if you don’t have
the intention to wear??
I once questioned myself. Maybe I'm not brave enough. Or maybe I'm not ready to let things go. What will people
judge me? How if my friends feel uncomfortable around me? The entire ‘if’
questions, it makes me uncertain.
But.
What you wear doesn't differ you from others. We're all the same in His eyes. I well known of myself. I fear that if I meant to wear veil, I only wear it to impress others. To gain attentions. I'm just an ordinary human. So weak, so full of lust.
So, this is not the time . . . yet. I'm not ready.
If I've been destine to wear it, all praise to Him.
Then, you shall have a daughter that you long her to wear a veil - mother.
